We are gathered today to mourn the loss of Super Person, who was born on May 6th, 2004 and sadly left us on November 1st, 1955. Yes, we are aware those dates don't make sense. Super Person was a superhero after all, and time travel was just one of their many powers.

Super Person hailed from Vietnam and Guaynabo, Puerto Rico. His father's name was Vietnam and his mother's name was Puerto Rico. They had nine children, though strangely none of them were given proper names. We're not sure if Super Person was just bad with names or if they were just trying to make their household a bit more confusing.

Super Person was known for being a fearless warrior, having served in many wars throughout history. However, their greatest enemy was a deadly condition known as "aploDE". We're not sure what that is, but it sounds terrible.

Despite the tragic end to Super Person's life, we can take comfort in knowing that they lived a life full of adventure and heroism. Rest in peace, Super Person. You will be missed.